Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Nothing new

Nothing new really happening....

I had Christian chicken last night before seeing The Dark Knight. That was yummy- got me a 4 count kiddos meal. The cow came over and we "talked". I asked him why he wasnt on all fours and assured him I was eating chicken and not cow. He came back with those yummy buttermints. yum yum!!

Work is busy. School is busy. Life is busy. But really nothing new to report. Had a great time with the kiddos this past weekend. Everyone got along well so that is good.

Until next time..........

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Christian Chicken

Just a little post about some of the greatest food in the world- the Christian Chicken. I love Chick-Fil-A. They have great food. And a great mission; Chick-fil-A's mission statement is "to glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us and to have a positive influence on all who come in contact with Chick-fil-A."

I love the batter this yummy, Christian Chicken is rolled in. It's just delicious!! The little yummy pickles at the bottom- which I take out and eat first- are a staple. To top it off, I can get this delicious chicken in the morning on a perfectly cooked biscuit! Umm hello?!?! Does it get any better? I think not.

If I get the little nuggets of gold, I always look forward to the "crunchies" at the bottom of the box. The dipping sauces vary- honey or ranch and buffalo sauce. Either way, it is the greatest.

Then, there are the waffle fries. Yes, I love waffle fries. The kind of fries you push down into your ketchup or ranch and watch it bubble up from the openings. Yummm! Perfect, golden and lightly salted potatoes of perfection.

Have I mentioned their awesome sweet tea? I could be hooked up to an IV of that- woo hoo! Right now, I am enjoying a gallon of their tea. Ok, well probably a half gallon but who cares? I decided that breakfast was so good, I had to share....admit made you hungry didnt it?

Well, tomorrow if you dress like a cow you get free food! I am seriously considering it....mooo!

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Here today, gone tomorrow

Anyone who knows me knows I dont deal with death well, at all. I don't grieve like 'normal' people and I certainly don't "get over it" like most.

My paternal grandmother passed away almost 3 years ago and while I dont cry every night thinking about her, it is hard to think of her and not cry. I had the opportunity to visit with her the week before she died. However, work got in the way. My boss was pretty much insane and I knew she would give me crap about leaving so I waited until the next weekend- a 3 day weekend. One week too late. I hated myself. I didnt understand why or how it happened and why I wasnt able to say goodbye.

To say I love her is to barely scratch the surface. I saw so much of myself in her and admired her traits. She was hard working- she got on to me for half cleaning my bathroom when she visited one and as a 12 year old I was upset with her for that.

She taught me to play solitare. When I was losing, to myself (!!!!), I would only turn over 1 card instead of three and instead of letting me just play, she called me out. "That's cheating!" My first thought, 'I am losing to myself...and who am I cheating on? Me?' As simple as those two things are, it taught me a lot about self. Honor isnt necessarily a badge one wears but it is what you do in secret. That reveals the most about who you are on the inside.

Unfortunately my paternal grandfather passed away before I was able to make any strong memories with him but if he was anything like my father, he must have been a wonderful man: a generous, intelligent and loving man. He produced 6 wonderful children- children are reflections of their upbringings. My grandfather was no doubt a great man...after all my Grandmama B loved him!

This past weekend, my maternal grandfather passed away. I still cannot deal with death. How was he here last month and not today? I played board games with him and my parents for almost 2 hours. The only health issue he really had was a bum knee! Why did God choose to take him from us? Yes, it is selfish to want him wish him back from the very presence of God but still I want to be selfish. I want my grandfather. I want to hear his voice, his laugh and see his smile. It isnt fair. I know life isnt fair but why cant it be? He touched so many lives with his warmth and smile. God, he was a good man. I dont understand suffering and I dont understand this pain nor how it could be part of God's plan. What kind of plan is this? He was my granddaddy and I miss him.

I am not angry with God. It is one thing I purpose myself to remember. However, I am mystified and want some sort of answer, some big pointy arrow to show me why. So I like to tell God, I am struggling. I am upset and confused but not angry at Him. I am angry at the situation but not Him. It's hard because I dont understand. Again, I dont deal with death well and I dont ever really want to deal with it "well", better sure.

I never read C.S. Lewis' books 'The Problem of Pain' or "A Grief Observed" but I think it might be time. I need something. This weekend reminded me of my own mortality and my parents'. That thought makes my heart stop. I cant bury my parents. I cant bury my father. I just cant. So I guess he is going to have to take better care of himself :-)

Keep me in your prayers.